May 16, 2007

These entries are stream of conscious. I write what I am experiencing in the moment. Some are good impressions, some are critical. I go through emotions from excitement to depression. Each may last only a few hours or so. I hope you find them are worthy of reading.

May 10, 2007

OK, it’s Thursday evening and, again, I am bored and wondering what to do. I have little to do here and I really don’t feel like just traveling and being a tourist. I want to get involved and be busy. I can’t just sit around and do nothing. I have felt that I just sat in my tiny hot apartment and waited for an idea to come to me to be busy. I listened to Od Yavo Shalom Aleinu a moment ago and remembered: Get out of your head. Just be present in life. Be here. I felt much better after that. I am still lonely, though. I have to keep reminding myself to be present and enjoy each breath.

I just remembered my commitment to Africa. I will remember: When I get sad, give, give, give. It’s not about me. It’s about Tikkun Olam (repairing the world). I will work it. I just sent an email to someone at American Jewish World Service about getting me info on Africa.

Friday, May 11, 2007
I have written to Derreck Kayongo of CARE and have a meeting with him tonight at 7:00. We will have a conference call with the head of CARE in UGANDA. I am also writing to other organizations.

Today is a “yellow day” in Tel Aviv. The sky is yellow and there is little sun. All seems so dirty. The A/C in my tiny apartment was not working and the landlord brought out a guy to repair it. My window (the only window) is on the 2nd floor and is about 20 feet up. The A/C unit is outside of my next door neighbor’s window. So, David, my contact with the landlord who does everything from rentals to maintenance to sweeping, was holding the ladder for the A/C guy. The A/C guy was precariously standing on top of the A/C compressors working when my next door neighbor opened his window and the two men got into a scuffle: fist fight and all. It was ugly. I was so afraid that the A/C guy was going to fall and die. David yelled for me to help and, since his door was opened, I went in and (gently) grabbed the guy and asked him to let go. I didn’t grab him to throw him on the bed or anything. I just held him a gently and told him to please let go of the other guy and that he could fall. I didn’t know this guy but I knew he was crazy enough to try to push a contractor from a ladder onto the cement below. They finally stopped fighting and the guy fixed the A/C. I still don’t know what happened as David told me he would tell me later. They jawed at each other later when the guy was off the ladder and the neighbor came downstairs. David had to get between them. What the hell was going on?
David later told me the guy claimed that he thought it was a burglar trying to break in.

My pride pattern got triggered then, too. You see, David’s company had told me the rent was $1,000/month but when I got here, they said it was $1,200. They told me that it was the next door neighbor’s apartment that was $1,000 and that he had decided to stay another week or so. I could rent that one for cheaper when he left. They said it was smaller and they thought it would have been available. Since I went in there, I saw that it was MUCH bigger and nicer with more amenities. I feel ripped off… again. The same happened with my cell phone. The owner of the store told me he would buy back the phone after 2 months for 80% of the price. He said it had a speakerphone and that calls were about 12 cents/minute. Calls are over 30 cents/minute and the phone has no speaker. He also says he won’t buy it back for the 80% and that he can’t be responsible for the rates. Anyway, the guy’s a crook… I hate these Jewish stereotypes. I know there are good and bad people in every culture but I naively wish that I could think Jews strived to live on a higher plane.

I am learning that this angry blunt way of many of the Israelis is not just a front. There is some real anger there. I have had this conversation often. To generalize, they like to think they are like New Yorkers. They all love New York but they are much harsher here. I still don’t know if this is just the people in fast moving Tel Aviv or if it’s Israelis in general. There is little politeness that we are accustomed to in the South. Israelis will tell you that you have to be assertive if not aggressive when there are others around. They don’t form lines and they will force their way in front of you and not care who is in front of them.

As I am critical of some of the culture, I feel that I have an understanding of how it came to be. This is a tiny country. Compare Israel’s 8,000 square miles including The Golan Heights to State of Georgia’s 60,000 square miles. Much of the country is desert. It’s tiny. Israelis have often traveled out of this tiny land. They know what it’s like in the rest of the developed world. When you see them on the street, they might be from Atlanta or Cleveland. You have to hear them talk to realize they are really from here. They feel cooped up. Also, during the last Intifada, bombs were going off often and people were being torn to pieces. They were afraid to leave their homes yet they had to live their lives, work, and study. This lasted for a few years and is still simmering. Many stores and restaurants have to hire a guard to check all packages before you can come in. All of the malls and crowded public events are walled off so guards can check everyone. Yet, they know that this won’t stop a suicide terrorist. It has worn them down. It’s such a small country. Where will they go?

So, people are often harsh and undiplomatic. Some business people think that they have the right to rip you off and that it’s your fault if you let them do so. Of course, there is some of this all over the world. I wonder if this is a Middle Eastern mentality. One of the most fascinating things about Israel is that it is unification of so many cultures in a place that is the unification of Africa, Asia, and Europe. Add South Americans, North Americans, and Australians, and you’ve got the stew of this culture. Before I arrived, I worried that a civil war could break out here if there was true peace in the middle east. Russians, Iraqis, Yemenites, French (Oh, the French), North and South Americans, Brits; all are coming together in this tiny place in a dangerous neighborhood. More on this later…

I had a date with a woman from the country of Georgia. She was candid without malice. I met her at the newest and most beautiful shopping mall in Israel that is right under the tallest building in Israel. She had told me that she was from Russia but had been here for 17 years. She was not keen on Israelis. I had a great conversation with her and let her know where my head and heart were as well as my opinion of Israelis so far. She responded so well that I wanted to hug her immediately. She said,

“You are obviously such an intelligent and handsome man. However, most women are looking for someone that is stable and that has solid career plans. They want to know they will be provided for and that their children will be provided for. Also, since you aren’t sure if you will stay in this country, you compose another risk. ‘Vague’ may be attractive to a 23 year old woman who wants adventure and has no responsibilities, but people like me need to hear that a man has a solid career foundation. You are so nice. You need someone around 30 to 32 years old. I have someone that I would like you to meet.”

I really liked hearing that. I was honest and open. It was good to hear that I need to be more focused and decisive in my being here. I needed to hear it. I have been impatient in my wanting to have a network of friends. It’s been slow and people often work late. They don’t want to meet until around 10:30 at night – any night. School starts for me at 8:00 AM. Therefore, I will be more productive in my time off. I can’t drift around. I don’t want to.